That about sums up my insides tonight. I should be happy and grateful for the things I have. But I still have this nagging feeling, kicking me in my back. What is it? Who the hell knows. This is probably because I have some major life changes going on right now. God knows I do NOT adjust well to change.
Another day, another panic attack. More feelings of mistrusting my own choices. I just feel like I can’t clear the fog in my head enough to trust what choice to make. I wish there was a non drugged induced way to take a break from reality, if even for just one night. This has been a rough couple weeks.
We did get some good news today. My dad’s cancer in his bladder is slow growing, and is just shy of stage 1. So he will need some chemo treatments soon. But the prognosis is very positive.
Time to go drowned myself in to some NHL playoff hockey.